What’s Your Favorite Irreverent Heathen Super Bowl Commercial? Cast Your Vote! 20

Hello Everybody!

Sorry for taking Monday off and not posting anything yesterday. I was busy researching.

I invested hours of time watching the Beyoncé Super Bowl Halftime Ritual over, and over, and over…  searching for deep dark illuminati symbolism. Here is what I found:

A Triangle! Seriously, look! Do you see the triangle!

A Triangle! Seriously, look! Do you see the triangle!

Yes, there definitely was A TRIANGLE!

There was probably more than that, too. But I’ll leave the rest of the dirty work for Alex Jones, who will certainly fill us in on all the minutia (he’ll tell you it’s not just a triangle, but a triangle with an “All-Seeing-Eye” and a little something else if you are skilled in detecting the illuminati’s secret messages). Be prepared!

I can at least say that Beyoncé was appropriately dressed — for Beyoncé, that is. We’re accustomed to seeing her prancing around in sado-masochistic patent leather lingerie in front of entranced crowds of frothing teens. In that sense, she was dressed appropriately.

Um. Yeah.

So as you can tell, I woke up on the snarky side of the bed this morning. I think that had something to do with my real discovery yesterday, and that is…

The Scientology-Atheism Connection!

Eureka! I found it! And it was brought to you by Super Bowl XLVII (which is Koine Greek for 47 for those of you who did not know that). Let me explain the Scientology-Atheism Connection to you in just a moment. It will be good, I promise!

First, I’d like to get your opinion on that other attraction we look forward to during the Super Bowl — besides pizza, beer, wings, nachos, guacamole, popcorn, food-fights, vacuuming, shampooing, and disinfecting the living room and flat-screen TV, when it’s all over and done with. I’m talking about Super Bowl Commercials(ism).

It just seems to get more and more blatantly hedonistic every year. We think we notice but we probably don’t, because we are probably more desensitized than we think.

After all, no wardrobe failure during the halftime show this year. Wasn’t necessary.

I don’t know if you noticed, but this year I found the commercials to be particularly irreligious. Here are some examples. I provided just the links to the videos here, in case you want to review them again. I can’t blame you if you don’t, because some of them were a little distasteful.

First sample: Sell your soul to the Devil (alias, Willem “Last Temptation of Christ” Dafoe) for a Mercedes-Benz, with Rolling Stones “Sympathy for the Devil” blaring in the background. The choice of music from the Stones was definitely original. I might have expected “Hotel California” instead. You know, “Her mind is def’nitly twis-ted … She got a MER-CE-DEZ-BEEENZ! (Uh!)”… Speaking of selling your soul to the devil (Just sayin’).

Second sample: A little Voodoo? (series), Sponsored by Bud Light (sorry excuse for a beer). This time it was Stevie Wonder’s “Superstitious” blaring in the background. That whole thing was… strange. “Come on, James! It was comical. Don’t be so serious! I mean, it’s New Orleans, get it?” Yeah, I got that. Sorry, but comical is not the word I’d use to describe it. I thought the whole thing was demented and eerily cryptic. (Incidentally, I also thought it looked like the Voodoo Lady in the last part of the series borrowed from Beyoncé’s wardrobe — a thematic touch for the evening).

Third sample: The Joe Montana “Miracle-Stain” Tide commercial. I know a lot of people thought it was funny. It was goofy. But let’s not overlook the fact that it was a blatant satire of religion. I know this because I help administrate a discussion page where atheists debate with Christians. The “Joe Montana Miracle-Stain” is exactly the type of thing that some (but not all) atheists use to ridicule Christians. The ad was pure mockery, yet deemed worthy of the Super Bowl (whereas the ad with white man speaking with a Jamaican accent was called “highly controversial”) and it wasn’t all that subtle. Apparently our society sees this as an acceptable way to jeer at miracles, and Christianity and religion along with it — with the help of the entertainment industry.

Montana Miracle-Stain, it's funnier than the shroud of Turin

Montana Miracle-Stain, it’s funnier than the shroud of Turin

Not to exaggerate — there was nothing “over the top” in any of these videos. They were just pointedly irreligious, in my humble opinion.

In the end (the moment we were all waiting for with bated breath) the man in the “Sympathy for the Devil” comercial did not sell his soul to Willem Dafoe. After a suspenseful moment of deliberation — wheels turning in his head — he smugly remarked, “Thanks… but I think I’ve got this,” implying he had enough money (or credit). And if he didn’t…?

Doesn’t matter, because Willem “the Devil” Dafoe disintegrated into a cloud of black smoke and dust that fell to the floor, where he belongs, and we were left to suppose that the stunning young man became even stunninger as he drove off in his new Mercedes-Benz with Super-Model, Kate Upton (since she was part of the bargain), but we did not get to see that part.

So the message was if you drive a Mercedes, you also get Kate Upton, or did he have to sell his soul for that part of the deal?

So the message was if you drive a Mercedes, you also get Kate Upton, or did he have to sell his soul for that part of the deal?

Commercialism. What exactly are they selling? Cars? Detergent? Beer? If so, the means and ends do not match up too logically. So I’m not convinced that’s all they’re selling.

Okay, maybe the Mercedes commercial was perfectly logical — who wouldn’t sell their soul to the devil for a Mercedes-Benz?

The Super Bowl isn’t a game. It’s a platform arrayed with a bonanza of entertainment: the greatest game, the greatest female performer, live in full concert mode, and the year’s greatest commercials featuring… repeated hedonistic satire of religious themes.

Here’s something you probably missed if you did not go back and review the commercials on Youtube. As I mentioned earlier…

The Scientology-Atheism Connection:

Both of the following commercials did not air Super Bowl Sunday night, only the one for Scientology did. The interesting thing is that they are the exact same commercial with the exception of the ending. The first one promotes Atheism, the second promotes Scientology. Play both videos at the same time to see what I mean.

Now, what does this say about:


And Scientology?

It says they are both being promoted as one big lie (given the connection made here by the ones who produced these Super Bowl ads).

L. Ron Hubbard, the founder of Scientology, was a conman. He knew he could use religion to deceive people and make money. At the core it is the aberration of religion. It’s diabolical.

The producers of these two Super Bowl ads paid millions of dollars to continue promoting the same scam. Millions of people watched, and maybe most of them just shrugged. Some of them became curious, perhaps, and others probably inquired further, since that is what ads are designed to make us do.

All of these ads, the halftime show, the whole Super Bowl ritual is a platform aimed not just at entertaining you; it’s aimed at your consumer instinct. They are not just selling you detergent and lots of cute babies and animals dressed up as astronauts (which have nothing to do with the products they are selling). They are selling you ideas. Maybe you’re not buying it. It’s still a good idea to pay close attention to what you, your family, and your friends are being sold.

Here is an example of what I thought was a good comercial. When it aired, the room immediately fell silent — not a Dorito crunched.  We sat on the edge of our seats anticipating, waiting for Paul Harvey to deliver “the rest of the story.”

Almost makes you want to go out and buy a truck, doesn’t it?

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  1. Wow. You stated it so well.
    I love the Einstein photo & caption. How true, how very true, and just the perfect sound-byte to use in a discussion on this matter.

    • Thanks, Reinkat. I suppose Einstein wouldn’t object being used anachronistically to get this point across, since he was the great pioneer of the time-space paradox.

  2. Thank you for your thoughtful analysis, James. Of the three commercials, the only one I found distasteful was the Montana ad. It was clearly meant to disparage people of faith, especially those images the Church has declared valid and efficacious for meditating upon in order to bring souls closer to God. (It was probably written by the same sarcastic people who gave us the Darwin fish that I sometimes see on the back of cars.) But I must tell you that I found the halftime show deeply disturbing with its suggestive poses and outfits. Most families watch the game and half-time show together and the NFL continues to peddle sex to them on their greatest stage. While Beyonce is a gifted singer, couldn’t we have an entertaining and family-friendly show of performers memorializing the Jazz era, especially since the game was held in the den of jazz, New Orleans?

    • A classy Jazz era performance would have been a much better, in deed, a great idea! With all the money they dumped into this performance (which from a technical standpoint was absolutely stellar — notwithstanding the wardrobe issues), the creative minds behind the scenes could have come up with something a lot more enriching and edifying.

      But in the entertainment age, it’s all about maximizing their profit. That is where all the thought goes, ultimately. Sex and celebrity appeal are the keys to capturing the American audience and keeping the $$$$ flowing.

      Entertainment = Commercialism. That’s just what it is, today. Our society desperately needs a Renaissance, a deep cultural renewal to pull us out of the adolescent decadence that is eroding our long held, most cherished values. I’m hoping and praying for that to happen some time soon.

  3. Funny, I’ve been thinking lately that I wanted a truck…and maybe a rifle. Must be the farmer in me, or just that I spent some time in the Southwest. We are the rest of the story. God bless America!

    • Amen to that, Liz! That commercial was about the things we value the most: love, family, hard work, integrity, and good-will. It makes us appreciate the things we have and the people who constantly make the hidden sacrifices necessary so that we can enjoy it. And it goes to show that America is still the land of the free and the home of the brave. You’ve got to love this country.

      Okay, in a sense it was a commercial like the rest (but not just like the rest). I’m glad, though, that someone — Dodge Motor Co., in this case — still sees it fit to bring the message of God into our homes through their advertising. It is a recognition that we are still a God-loving nation, and it makes me proud. Gives me goosebumps.

  4. It’s pathetic that I had to shout “close your eyes children” during the superbowl and I was surrounded by people yelling “Jesus!” at every 49er error. Then the Scientology commercial came on and I just kept thinking how funny they are telling us to be free thinkers while trying to brainwash us into thinking like them. Are we all robots already? I think the Catholic Church needs to jump into Television marketing. Not that they would get any air time… maybe Gorilla marketing would be better.

    • Lol! Gorilla marketing techniques! Thanks for giving us something to laugh about! 😆

      Your observation about the Scientology commercial is Spot-On. I read similar negative reactions to it from a lot of people, and no positive reactions.

      Here’s what gives me a lot of hope. A lot of people react to these things in the way that you did, showing concern for their children and the agressive environment they are going to be faced with. Sure, there are strong challenges facing us now and down the road. But the threatening signs are causing people to catch on better to what is going on, and they are preparing their families to confront the secularizing trends in the world.

      I’m looking forward to seeing what gorilla-squirrels will look like when the time comes for them to make their move.

      God bless, Foraging Squirrel, you and your family.

  5. I’m sorry I did not watch any of the Idol Super Blow. My wife and took our eldest grandson out to dinner at a fine restaurant that did not have TV. There was a time when I was a football fan, but when the players and teams wanted me to worship them God stepped in and I lost my desire to watch them. I guess I am just a old fool who had one idol in his life replaced with Jesus! I do not belittle any who still enjoy pro football but it is just something I don’t need anymore!

    • There are certainly things more important that football, God and family, obviously. It’s admirable for a person to have their priorities in order and to recognize where one may need to cut some frivolities from one’s life.

      I don’t want to disparage what can be a healthy and enjoyable pastime and definitely enjoy both pro and college football a lot. But sports for entertainment in this country has become more than a frivolity. It mirrors and supersedes religion in many ways. As you put it, for many people it comes very close to idolatry. Perhaps, NFL football — on SUNDAY — is most closely analogous to religion today. People will miss church but won’t miss their weekly devotion to the hometeam. Pre-game and tale-gating can become ritualistic. Stadiums are like mega-cathedrals drawing enormous crowds of devotees. Some fans decorate rooms in their homes like shrines.

      And let’s not even talk about the money being pumped into these events, the addiction to the hype, the talkshows, the amount of academic level knowledge invested in stats and trivia. And then there’s fantasy football.

      No. There are definitely more important things in life. All these things mentioned above can be fun and good as hobbies, but when they edge God and family out of our lives, when they consume our lives, we need to step back and reassess our priorities, I think.

      Thanks for your comment!

    • It was certainly a motivating commercial. One reason why I would resist buying a dodge truck or any truck for that matter is fule economy. Right now, I’m mostly walking or riding a bike, because gas prices around here are absolutely insane!

    • It depends on whether or not you like football. I really do and it ended up being a very exciting game down to the last minute. But of course there is more to life than football and we all have to admit that the Super Bowl gets way too much hype.

      The observation I’ve been making lately, seems to be an obvious one for anyone who has been paying attention to anything for the last 10 years, at least (to say the least). Namely, the entertainment industry has become insanely hedonistic and disdainful of traditional values, especially religious values. They have resorted to mockery and use all their means, movies, music shows and even commercials as a platform for ridiculing traditional values and promoting their own. The reflection on our society is that we are buying it. So what we see projected on the TV screen is a reflection of our decadent culture.

      I don’t want to be the prophet of doom. Rather, I believe we need to think deeply about the issues facing our Christian culture in order to find ways to safe guard it and promote it to the present and future generations, or else, I believe we are going to be squelched.

  6. Hey, James,
    Your reaction to both the Montana Stain commercial AND the Benz one was identical to mine. Maybe because my radar is permanently locked in place, but to me both were blatant as can be.

    I have no wish to join the burgeoning consortium of the “Eternally Aggrieved”, but it’d be nice if so many places didn’t seem to go out of their way to be offensive to Christians/Catholics. And worse, they then treat currently politically correct groups as if they were made of crystal.

    I simply try to keep a mental list of the companies that advertise to me without directly offending me, and then spend my money accordingly.

    It also helps keep me sane when I see some of the even worse ads out there…

    • It’s also good to see tasteful, respectable, and well done advertising, such as the one featuring the voice of Paul Harvey above and one that I posted yesterday, from Huggies. I suppose I need to be careful not to focus just on the negative. However, we really need to keep an eye open for threats against our religion, culture, values, and way of life, so that we can counter those attacks and preserve ourselves. Thanks, JTR!

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